Sam in the Pit
by XxKat-OF-ShadowsxX
Summary: Everyone is making a big deal about Sam being in the box with Lucifer and Michael. Well it really wasn't all that bad. In fact, you might consider it enjoyable. Let's take a look shall we.
1. Chapter 1

I have watched the first two episodes of season 7 and I want to cry. This might get to having spoilers of some sort so let's just be safe okay? I you don't like spoilers this is your warning.

Usually I'm a Castiel all the way fangirl but this plot bunny wouldn't let me sleep. I'm not even kidding. ^^

Uhhhh, Disclaimer: I don't own supernatural, though I don't think I could make the Destiel any more obvious if I did save them actually saying something about it or kissing *giggle*

Disclaimer: No Angels, Demons, Winchesters, or elephants were harmed in the making of this fanfiction.

Sam's time in the pit wasn't as bad as everyone thinks it was. In fact some parts of it were very amusing. Let's take a look shall we?

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><p>Sam's regained consciousness last thing he remembered was falling, there was Dean` and Cas was- then he- he fell into the pit with Michael and Lucifer. Sam opened his eyes and saw a room, just a normal room.<p>

"Ung." Sam got up slowly he was aware that Lucifer wasn't in his body any longer, but then what happened to him. Sam looked and at the other end of the room were two more people. One was that of Lucifer as Sam knew when he wasn't in his true vessel. The other was a man, not Adam but someone similar, same hair color but longer and he was older looking. Sam assumed that this was Michael.

Both began to stir and Sam backed off.

"What the hell?" Michael jumped up to his feet.

"Heh, that pretty much sums it up, dumbass." Lucifer rolled over and laughed.

"You!" Michel stomped over to Lucifer and held him up by his shirt, "This is all _your _fault! You just couldn't get control of your vessel, could you?"

"My fault?" Lucifer smacked Michael's hands from him, "You couldn't even get your true vessel to agree to take you! You had to take some long dead body with a child's soul. That says a lot about _your_ character doesn't it?"

Michael scoffed, "Because your character is any better, I could go on for the rest of eternity about all the faults in your character."

Lucifer summoned a knife to his hands, "You know nothing about my true character! Back off!"

"Oh so now you want to fight? Now that it's too late?" Michael summoned a sword to his hand, "Fine! We fight!"

The two clashed and Sam just stayed where he was. The fight dragged on for some time and Sam was beginning to get bored. The room was too big for them to cause much danger to Sam in their fight. After a while Sam was wishing for a deck of cards. He sighed to himself and began to slink to the floor. But instead of slinking to the floor he ended up in a chair, at a table, with a deck of cards in front of him.

He froze, processing what just happened, apparently on this plane of existence Sam had the ability to bend the pit to his will as well as Lucifer of Michael. Sam sighed in relief, that would even the odds when they brought their attention to him. In the meantime though, forever doesn't overcome boredom by itself. He shuffled himself a game of solitaire as the sounds of battle raged around him.

It seemed so long, such a long time, when the sounds of battle ceased. Sam looked up and saw both of them panting, covered with each other's blood.

Sam gathered up the cards as they approached his table. Lucifer sat in a chair on his left, Michael to his right. Both looked exhausted from their endeavors. Sam was feeling pretty weirded out that he was at a table with a devil and an angel and neither of them were trying to kill him yet.

Sam nodded to the middle of the table and a bottle of scotch and three glasses appeared. Lucifer instantly reached for the bottle and downed two glasses before pouring one for Michael. Michael looked at the glass skeptically , Lucifer gulped a third glass and sighed contentedly, "You think up good booze kid, I'll give you that."

Michael raised the glass to his lips and copied his brother's actions of swigging it down, then broke out into a coughing fit, Lucifer laughed and Michael did an unconvincing job at trying to glare while coughing.

"Uh, y-you should probably try sipping that first." Sam said trying to be helpful. Michael glared at him but did as he was told. Lucifer snorted into his drink.

"So, uh," Sam coughed, "What now? Are you, I mean, are you-" He couldn't finish, he was positive that torture would start.

"You really think I'm a horrible monster don't you? Maybe later if I get bored, but I mean come on, torturing for the rest of eternity? I would get bored way too quickly. No, no it's better if I keep you sane enough to think up some more good booze." Lucifer nodded pointedly to the near empty bottle.

Sam blinked and thought up another full bottle of scotch, "Can't you fill it up yourself?"

Lucifer shook his head as he poured, "s'not the same. No one has the same mind just as no one has the same soul patterns. There's always a difference, idiot."

"He's human, no one would have told him that so he wouldn't have known about that. Don't be stupid." Michael scolded.

"Humans can think for themselves, unlike a certain daddy's little boy I know of." Lucifer jibed back.

Michael twitched and gripped the glass tighter, "Our Father's not here anymore, I had to do something."

"Ha, yeah, pick a fight with your bother downstairs and break all of daddy's toys, nice plan. You fit in his shoes perfectly." Lucifer sneered.

"At least I was doing something! You were stuck here! You got to be whatever after you left, but I had to stay in order to do out Father's bidding!" screamed Michael.

"What? Jealous?" smirked Lucifer.

"I most certainly am not! I love our Father!"Michael stood from his chair.

"I love him too. I just didn't want to bow before a pair of patchy monkeys he claimed were his greatest creation. A few of them aren't so bad though." Lucifer smirked leaning back in his chair.

"Name two humans that you actually like." Michael challenged unconsciously clenching and unclenching his fists.

"Easily, One:" Lucifer put up one finger, "Sammy here, he thinks up good booze.", Michael scoffed, "Two:", Lucifer put up another finger, "Dean Winchester, because he royally pissed you off, and I kinda like a kid with a mind of his own."

Michael grumbled and Sam sensed another fight coming along so he took out the deck of cards again and shuffled, suddenly though both sat back down and said, "Deal me in."

Sam looked from one to the other, "Uh, I'm here if you want to, ya know, talk or something-" Sam stopped talking when both of them gave him a look and he coughed awkwardly, "Okay then, any objections to a game of poker? No? Right."

They played poker for hours (in "Pit Time" according to Lucifer) before Michael actually started getting the hang of the game. Then Lucifer started cheating and Michael learned that after some more hours. Sam learned a lot of shuffling tricks from Lucifer who boasted that he invented most of them.

After a week or so and about a thousand games of blackjack, castle, and spoons, Lucifer decided that it was time that Michael learned how to really drink. Sam almost vocalized thoughts against it but he remembered how amusing Castiel had been when he "drank a liquor store" so he kept his mouth shut.

Needless to say, Michael did not have the same alcohol tolerance that Castiel did, at least not in the pit. He was a giggly drunk too which just made things awkward so Lucifer and Sam dumped him on a couch and left him there while Sam read a book and Lucifer made faces at him for making him help think up all the books he ever read.

After some time Michael was able to take several shots at a time without blanching, Lucifer saw that as a good enough amount of improvement and started playing Battleship with Sam a referee. The Battleship game, though, was made with real ships and real explosions so there wasn't any lying if you're ship was actually hit.

BOOM!

"Haha! Sunk! In your FACE Luci!" Michael was drunk and playing battleship so he was a giggling mess snorting every time he plugged in a piece on his board.

"What the HELL did you just call me?" Lucifer looked honestly flustered

"I. Called. You. Lucy, LUCY~!" Michael put his hand on his hip in a very bitchy pose.

"Oh it's on now, bro. Your fleet is SCRAP! Delta Five!"

"MISS~!"

"ARRRRRG!"

Sam marveled at how the "room" they were in changed to fit their needs. Sam developed a room for himself to sleep in after all the times he woke up with marker on his face and became immune to the warm water on your hand while sleeping trick. Michael explained that his body, soul, and mind were all in the pit so that would probably mean that he still needed to carry out the needs of basic humans still. Sad thing that meant was that he still needed to use the bathroom, so that room was developed as well. Soon the area with the bedroom and bathroom was referred to as "Sam's corner", if you could refer to a pocket of space as a corner.

All three were lounging in very comfortable chairs (of Michael's mind) when Sam got up, "I need to use the head, No cheating." He stared at Lucifer pointedly, as Sam walked away though Lucifer picked up his cards and looked at them before putting them down with a scoff, "His cards suck."

Michael looked very smug though and before Lucifer could so much as glare at him suspiciously he put down the cards triumphantly, "Chin."

"What? No."

"Check 'em"

"Damn it."

A year passed by, almost without Sam noticing if not for the pit clock and calendar Lucifer gave him (Sam ignored Lucifer's snide remarks to his human senses). Sam nearly had a mental breakdown with the knowledge that only about three days had passed by on Earth. That was when Lucifer attacked.

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><p>~1month =~10years so ~30days=~10years so ~3days=~1year, there you have my line of thinking.<p>

Drabble yaaaay, okay. This plot bunny wouldn't leave me alone, I'm sorry. ^^"

I was watching the new episodes of Supernatural and kept thinking "What if his time in the pit wasn't that bad? I mean come on torturing for ten years has to get boring right? And it's not like Sam is with Azazal or anything. He was with Lucifer and Michael, two Angels (Lucifer used to be one) and they have to have more interests than torture. That and they needed to be introduced to all the fun quirks of humans of the 21st century, right? Eh well this is here anyway.

I have at least one more chapter to add to this so it's not complete yet. I have one year done and there are ten to get through! ^^ lol


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, so this is the second installment of Sam's time in the Pit. The second installment of this…. It will be the last just so I can think more about my other fics and I have a lot of college stuff to do. So where were we? LoLs all around, right? Oh wait, Lucifer just attacking Sam in the last chapter, wasn't he? Well we better look at what happened. Might just be interesting. ^^

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><p><em>A year passed by, almost without Sam noticing if not for the pit clock and calendar Lucifer gave him (Sam ignored Lucifer's snide remarks to his human senses). Sam nearly had a mental breakdown with the knowledge that only about three days had passed by on Earth. That was when Lucifer attacked.<em>

"Have at you!" Lucifer whipped out a scimitar and slashed the blade at Sam. Sam jumped back the book he had been reading sliced in half by Lucifer's blade.

"Christ!" Sam stumbled back dropping the ruined text.

Lucifer dropped out of his battle stance to look at Michael who was lounging on a couch, "You think he would've learned my name by now." Michael waved his hand disinterestedly as he ate some chips that Sam had thought up for him.

Lucifer picked up half the book Sam dropped and tossed it at Sam, "Defend yourself!"

Sam caught the book and gave Lucifer one of his best bitchiest 'You're not serious, are you?' looks. Lucifer slashed at Sam once more and Sam scrambled out of the way, morphing the half-book into a gun in the process.

"Are you serious? A gun? Sam I expected more out of you! Be creative! This is WAR!" Lucifer tossed some ninja stars at Sam who jumped out of the way nearly in time.

"You ripped my jacket!" Sam exclaimed looking at the slash along the sleeve. Lucifer grinned as Sam took up a fighting position. "Fine you want creative, I'll get creative."

Sam raised the handgun to Lucifer who rolled his eyes, "a hand gun is hardly-" ,then the handgun turned into a grenade launcher. "-Oh, shi-"

Lucifer was blasted back and landed more feet away. Sam launched another grenade but Lucifer jumped behind a bunker, "NOW were getting somewhere! Good, good, surprise is always an excellent strategy."

"Can we stop now?" Sam said exasperated, he really wanted to finish that book first.

"It's just getting good Sammy~! Come on! This is fun! It's not like you're gonna die!"

Sam had to give him that, but he reckoned that it would still hurt. Sam's grenade launcher morphed into a scimitar as Lucifer willed it to be.

"Time for close combat!" Cried out Lucifer, Sam noted the very creepy light in his eyes as he charged at Sam.

They fought with swords, Sam used the sword alternately as he would a knife or a baseball bat (plus a couple moves he saw in the movies) while Lucifer used his like someone who invented the blade. Sam got injured a lot, but then Lucifer did too.

How long they fought Sam wasn't able to tell, after a while it blurred together. There was always that next move, just one more hit. There was never any satisfaction in the game seeing as they had to stop every now and again to regenerate. Regenerating was a painful business for Sam who was the only human there. He also found it unsettling to see his skin and muscle growing back at a rate that was normally inhuman.

At some point they stopped fighting and Michael gave a cry of protest through a mouth full of chips. Sam gave him a well deserved bitch face and stomped off to "Sam's corner" with Lucifer crooning about how he won as loud as he could.

Time slipped in and out of Sam's grasp, one day he looked over to the time piece and was surprised to see that for him five years had passed, fifteen whole days since he had dropped into the pit. It now seemed like a long time to Sam, fifteen days and two bored angels. Sam was surprised at how little he was tortured, Lucifer seemed to get bored easily.

They played jenga out of this matter that would violently combust if you were too rough with the blocks. Lucifer and Michael weren't phased by it, but Sam being the "clumsy primitive sack of meat" that he was, or so Lucifer said, had trouble with keeping fingers. He started to build up a resilience to pain after some time, getting injured still hurt like a bitch but instead of screaming out and going into shock like most normal people would if their fingers were blown off, he would give a cry of pain and surprise and wrap the hand and sit out for two or three rounds until his fingers grew back. Lucifer wanted to know if Sam's head would grow back, but so far Sam was able to keep him at bay.

They also had created a television to watch shows and movies on. Lucifer would always grumble about how he never had this stuff during his time in the pit due to it not have been invented before he was cast in the pit. The problem was that Sam could only re-watch things and that got boring after a while. Though for some reason Michael kept on wanting to watch a syfy movie that Sam had fallen asleep to and they unlocked it from his mind, it was called _Stonehenge Apocalypse_, to Sam it was a very generic movie but Michael kept saying that the main character looked like his brother's vessel and found it amusing, whichever brother that was*.

One day, about seven and a half years into Sam's time in the pit, Sam really wanted his laptop. He missed it and he was sick of playing games with Lucifer and Michael. He really wanted a computer. Lo and behold, there in front of him was an exact replica of his old laptop down to the skull stickers on the front.

Lucifer popped up next to him, "Ooooo, Sammy here conjured up a laptop."

Michael got up from the couch and walked over to examine the newest item of entertainment. Sam was simply shocked that he could think up something so complex. It had all his old features on it, the background was still a picture of him and Jessica at a park.

Sam sat stunned for a bit until Michael lost his patience, "Well make it do something!"

Sam blinked and nodded clicking up the internet, and his home page of a good hunter's page came up and there were updates that Sam had never seen before.

"Well look at that," Lucifer said amusedly, "We get wifi in the pit."

Sam laughed at that entertainment would be very forthcoming with this established. Now he could read books that he never read before and weren't thousands of years old. He could continue watching shows and so much more.

He got on YouTube and started looking up the next episode in a show he used to watch but Lucifer interrupted his doing so by shoving his arm away from the mouse, "Look up my name. Look me up. I bet you it's badass."

"Uh sure fine why not." Sam typed in "Lucifer" into the search engine, "It's probably some crappy metal band or a song by cultists or something."

But the first thing that was listed was a weird video a song named 'Lucifer' by a band called 'Shinee'**. "What the-" but Michael shoved him away and clicked it. It was a Korean boy band. Michael laughed more that day than all the years of being in the pit. Sam laughed a good amount as well, it wasn't every day you got to see a bitch face on the Devil.

Lucifer was not amused to say the least and then proceeded to type in 'Michael', coming up with a singer with the name. Not the humiliation he was looking for but Michael was fairly offended that he wasn't being recognized. Sam just laughed at how silly Michael was being about it.

Then Lucifer found Google and that's when for the first time. Lucifer and Michael worked together. Against Sam.

They typed in his name and Supernatural as prompted by Michael who knew about Chuck. It was then that true torture started. A torture unlike any he had ever had the misfortune of experiencing... Michael and Lucifer found fanfiction. Fanfiction for Chuck's books Supernatural.

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><p>*Stonehenge Apocalypse Is a movie that stars Misha Collins, it was too tempting to put in so I did. ^^ Aside from it being another SyFy original movie and pretty cruddy overall, Misha did a really good job at acting. If you are a Misha lover (like me), it would be a good movie to see.<p>

**Shinee is a Korean band that I actually knew before I decided to put in the YouTube part in. I;m a geek so I like stuff like this. I'm also pretty sure that it's Michael Buble that comes up first. Eh.

This will prolly only have one more chapter. It's been fun to write about nonsensical things for once. I might do stuff like this more often. Right now what I'm doing more often than not is a Doctor Who story with a friend of mine and I'm scared to put it up on FF for it's the use of OC's major OC's not side character ones. It's one of those "if your character was in -" kind of things which I usually hate so I'm iffy about posting it but oh well.

I hope you've liked this one, so REVIEW please! ^^


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